Barack Obama has a
heart-attack and passes away.
He immediately goes to
hell, where the devil is waiting for him.
"I don't know what to do
here," says the devil.
"You are on my list
Obama, but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so
I'll tell you what I'm going to do."
"I've got a few folks
here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go, but you
have to take their place. I'll even let YOU decide who
Obama thought that
sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the door to the first room.
In it was Ted Kennedy and
a large pool of water. Ted kept diving in, and surfacing, empty handed.
Over, and over, and over he dived in and surfaced with nothing.
Such was his fate in
"No," Obama said. "I
don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer, and I don't think I could do
that all day long."
The devil led him to the
door of the next room. In it was Al Gore with a sledge-hammer and a room
full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after time after
"No, this is no
good; I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in
constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day,"
The devil opened a
third door. Through it, Obama saw Bill Clinton, lying on the bed,
his arms tied over his head, and his legs restrained in a
Bent over him was
Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best.
at this in shocked disbelief, and finally said, "Yeah man, I
can handle this."
The devil smiled
"OK, Monica, you're free to