President solution to air travel.

Dump the male flight attendants. No one wanted them in the first place.

Replace all the female flight attendants with good-looking strippers! What the hell -- t hey don't even serve food anymore, so what's the loss?

The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a 'party atmosphere' going in the cabin. And, of course, every businessman in this country would start flying again, hoping to see naked women.

Because of the tips, female flight attendants wouldn't need a salary, thus saving even more money. I suspect tips would be so good that we could charge the women for working the plane and have them kick back 20% of the tips, including lap dances and 'special services.'

Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women. Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues.

This is definitely a win-win situation if we handle it right -- a golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.

Why didn't Bush or Obama think of this? Why do I still have to do everything myself?

Sincerely,

Bill Clinton

TRUTH FUNNER THAN FICTION

ESCORTS PUTTING PRESSURE ON BANKERS

TAGS:Thrills&Spills, Crisis, Protest, Europe, Sex, Banking, Economy

Madrid’s high-class escorts have found a way to regulate the Spanish banking sector. The ladies want to have their say in the economy by withholding sexual pleasures from bank employees.
The largest trade association for luxury escorts in the Spanish capital has gone on a general and indefinite strike on sexual services for bankers until they go back to providing credits to Spanish families, small- and medium-size enterprises and companies.
It all started with one of the ladies who forced one of her clients to grant a line credit and a loan simply by halting her sexual services until he “fulfills his responsibility to society.”
The trade association's spokeswoman praised their success by stressing the government and the Bank of Spain have previously failed to adjust the credit flow.
"We are the only ones with a real ability to pressure the sector," she stated. “We have been on strike for three days now and we don't think they can withstand much more.”
She has revealed that bankers have made some pitiful attempts to use their services by pretending to be engineers or architects.
“But they don't fool anyone since it has been many years since these professionals could afford rates that start from 300 euro an hour," she continued.
The bankers reportedly became so desperate that they even decided to call in the government for mediation.
The Mexican website SDPnoticias.com, which initially published the story, cites the Minister of Economy and Competitiveness as admitting that the lack of legislation regulating the escort sector makes it very difficult for the government to intercede in the conflict.
"In fact, there has not even been a formal communication of the strike — the escorts are making use of their right of admission or denying entry to…well, you know. So no one can negotiate," he was quoted as saying.