SUM BITCH!

A large jet plane crashed on a farm in the middle of rural East Texas . Panic
stricken, the local sheriff mobilized and descended on the farm in force. By the
time they got there, the aircraft was totally destroyed with only a burned hull
left smoldering in a tree line that bordered the farm.
> 
The sheriff and his men entered the smoking mess but could find no remains of
anyone. They spotted the farmer plowing a field not too far away as if nothing had
happened.
> 
They hurried over to the man's tractor. "Hank," the sheriff yelled, panting and
out of breath. "Did you see this terrible accident happen?" "Yep. Sure did," the
farmer mumbled unconcerned, cutting off the tractor's engine. 
> 
"Do you realize that is Air Force One, the airplane of the President of the United
States ?"
> 
>"Yep."
> 
>"Were there any survivors?"
> 
"Nope. They's all kilt straight out," the farmer answered. "I done buried them all myself. Took me most of the morning."
> 
"President Obama is dead?" the sheriff asked.
> 
"Well," the farmer grumbled, restarting his tractor.
> 
"He kept a-saying he wasn't... But you know how bad that sumbitch lies...